Thursday, October 05, 2006

Come to think of it, Mr. Big was sort of a funny name as well...


Quick show of hands:

Who else found themselves strangely attracted to the hot lesbian lead singer of Mr. Big?

What?

Nobody?

Well, when Lean Into It was released in the early Spring of 1991, Mr. Big's hit song "To Be With You" catapulted the band into the national consciousness. And without a doubt, the beautiful face of the group was their hot lesbian lead singer, Erica Martin. Her gruff, soulful vocals struck a chord with America's music lovers. At the peak of the country's hair band/power ballad obsession, and just prior to Nirvana's Nevermind and "Smells Like Teen Spirit," the song that would become the soundtrack of the grunge revolution (or at least the soundtrack to many a VH1 special discussing the grunge revolution), "To Be With You" received loads of radio play, and brought fame and fortune to Mr. Big. When my older sister bought the CD, I remember listening to it on repeat and making a mix tape that was composed almost entirely of Mr. Big songs. On our family vacation up to New Hampshire that summer, the Mr. Big mix tape never left my walkman during the long car ride. And boy was I smitten when I browsed through the liner notes - I was completely floored when I saw the photographs of the band. Erica Martin had this sexy Joan Jett, Melissa Etheridge thing going on... the type of woman who would pick you up, spit you out, and ride off into the sunset on her motorbike, flipping you the bird all along the way. Basically, every guy's dream girl, and a powerful mental image for a boy entering the early stages of puberty.


And the band lived it up, taking full advantage of their popularity that Spring and Summer of 1991. Festivals throughout the country. Massive world tours. Fast foreign cars. As the old adage goes, SEX DRUGS & ROCK 'N ROLL! Most importantly, ladies for everyone, especially for hot lesbian lead singer Erica Martin. Her conquests were legendary (the rumors of an affair with a certain 90210 actress, while unsubstantiated, are now widely taken as fact). And...

What? There's no "a" at the end of her first name?

That's sort of weird. I guess "Chris" can be short for Christine, and "Sam" could be a nickname for "Samantha." I mean, I know she's a lesbian and all, but even so, "Eric Martin" is sort of a funny name for a woman - not funny because it sounds weird, but more funny because it's almost the same...

as...

a...



Oh, lord.

I think I need to explain some things to my mother.



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1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Omg I can't believe anyone would think that the hottest GUY on earth is a WOMAN ROTFL

9:55 AM  

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